If memory serves me, I think Michelle teaches that when in the LRT--one should not try to make much conversation and should give very short answers. That's not to say they are to act unfriendly......just don't initiate much conversation. It's best that you not bring up any of her feelings b/c it will likely to lead to R talk.
What would be more attractive would be for the LBH to pull back and do not chat too much. If she wants to talk to him about her day....she'll bring it up. If she wants to talk to him about her feelings, she'll bring it up. There are some times that "valadation" comes from simply listening (while looking her in the eye) and give a nod of the head.
I believe that many LBH's call themselves "valadating" when in reality they are "smothering" the W. Many LBH's try too hard and it ends up "overkill".
It's hard for the LBH to find that "balance" in the conversation, being friendly, validating, etc.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
