She's in MLC, but I was weak. Now what?

[crushednstuck]

Mach, I appreciate all the posts, really. But I'm honestly trying to sort out if my W is in MLC or if this has been the person she's always been. These behaviors, the anger and grudges have been present the entire time and not just when she left.

Yep, I'm all over the map. I can't imagine I'm the only one experiencing this range of emotion. I appreciate the time away from my W, but ironically, I now have less time to do the work. That's not to say the advice is ignored or minimized. I'm fully aware of my need for improvement yet finding where to start is difficult.
In general, I like me. The fling was not an attempt to get back at my W, but an attempt to make me feel better. Either way it was selfish, but I succeeded.