I want to be part of the group...

[Jstar]

i'm taking pleasure in him being so tired dealing with the realities of child care, work less sleep being exhausted, which i've lived since nov 09.

i want to have no contact no driving picking up dropping off, etc to get detachment and feel like the misbehaving child, well if i get any attention, good or bad it makes me happy...

how long do i have to sacrifice myself and happiness so he can watchkids while i work, having the constant interaction with out being able to move on...

i feel like i should just write it down, something to the effect of. i know i give you a difficult time about feeding cookies to d for breakfast, havng them clean and dressed and you are trying to learn how to parent them but my direction is only what is best for the kids. i appreciate you picking us up dropping us off to and from work, letting me borrow your truck so i can take kids places on weekends, but the constant time spent together driivng and 'family" activities, dinner, going to park is just a constant reminder of what the life i want and the life i don't have.