h comes picks up me and the kids, drops me at work, then picks me up with the kids, drops us off at home. there have been 1 or 2 times we've gotten something to eat, daughter so upset she i just took his truck with kids and said, my daughter is upset, we are doing this and other thing, you can take bus home or leave ur truck or join us. he joined us. he was attitudey but did it,.
he doesn't ask me anything about me, maybe i'm fishing, but with happy hr at work today, he had to do some juggling. i said i'm leaving work at 430 then going with some friends, told him where, he's like you want me to walk in there to give you keys to truck so you can pick up kids and go home, i'm like yep. he was like oh you're going out?? i give comment of going out with friends.
how am i to move on if we have this constant 2 times a day exposure? the first few weeks were so full of tension, it's less the past few days. now i'm suffering from no sex for months, close to year.
how do i get out of this zone so to speak and into non teensy weensy friend zone to more h/w zone?
it is impossible for me to move on, with the 2times daily interactions. detaching when we have to ride together to and from work, when d puts us together in family type activities.
i mean i did go to happy hour, it was okay. i got really upset, sad and teary, had to go outside for a minute. i just kept feeling, i don't want to be single, i want to go home to h and have loving relationship, be a family but here i am at this happy hour hearing about everyone else's relationships, seeing how much i remember the single life, how much i longed for family of h/w/kids and i've gotta do it again, 3rd marriage down tubes, 2 kids in the middle of mess....
Me 39 H 30 d 18 previous marriage d 2.5 with H s 4.5months with H Seperation Nov09 july i'm dim to dark - set internal deadline
