Nobody is suggesting you make rush decisions. What we are suggesting is for you to at least consider the fact that your W is not having an affair. She didn't just casually inform you she wanted a divorce and never mention it again. She told you she wanted a divorce, asked for a separation that you would not agree to, she LEFT you, has hardly spoken to you for a year except for the house issue, tried to move you closer to a separation by including 'language' indicating such in house paperwork and has blatantly refused any pursuing or attempt you have made to have her work on things.
Now she wants to date. Well, my guess is she wanted to date all along and finally decided she is doing waiting around for you to comply with the legal aspect of separation.
None of the questions we are asking you are unfair. Your W has behaved like a spoiled child for months now - she would not even help clean the home she (half) owns despite her desire to be rid of it. You didn't feel the need to expose any of that or at the very least set boundaries.
Some WAS are done. Plain and simple. It hurts but it is how it is.
All along there has been some very good suggestions made to you... finding a C who is more solution based and not just one who talks with you is crucial. You don't post goals that are concrete and I do think a different kind of C can help in that area.
Now though you are in a bind because you never set boundaries with your WAS and now you want to as things are totally winding down.
Go read some of the other forums - one poster comes to mind that hung around for 2 years for his W to return, she did and she left him again. Twice. And now due to his income he is getting financially raped. Financially raped, emotionally raped... there comes a time when you have to realize what is going on.
Your W is angry but IMO she is angry because you won't comply with her desire to divorce.
