"why do you think you need to yell at me for me to hear you? If you are frustrated about something then tell me?"
If he talks don't get defensive, he doesn't feel like you hear him. The yelling is his way of trying to control things.
Okay, I'll try to remember that. My mechanism for when I'm feeilng threatened is to flee. I'll try to address the situation instead. I've just found times where I simply cannot get through to him and it's better to let him cool down. In early years, he knocked things over, did silent treatment for weeks, name called, screamed. That is all mostly gone. In some respects we've made great strides in communicating with each other, in other respects we still have a ways to go.
He: WAH Me: LBW Precious: DD
~ I'm grateful for every day I have to improve the way I relate.
