I am really muddled fellow DB'ers.

Tomorrow wife and I depart on a 13 hour drive to our hometown to attend a wedding. We will remain in our home town the entire week and will be staying at my brother-in-law's house. The purpose of our week-long stay is to to help brother-in-law with a major home repair. Wife and I will be alone together during the day, working on the house, while brother-in-law is at work.

If you've read the above post, you know my wife intends to proceed with our divorce sometime after we return home. I should mention that I have been in this position with her several times. She filed in November; I signed the papers in April and she never followed through. Every so often she will renew her resolve, announce her intentions, and then nothing happens.

Lately, I have kept the "set them free" idea top of mind. I don't know how convincing I am when delivering this message. However, I have noticed that my lack of resistance does confound her -- its subtle but I see a difference. Maybe its time to deliver the "set them free" message in a more forceful manner.

We talked briefly this morning before she went to work. I wanted to confirm that she still intended to proceed with divorce when we return (wanted to keep my expectations grounded in reality). She answered with something like "Sometimes I am so sure its what I want to do but something is holding me back." I didn't probe any deeper.

We will have plenty of time to interact during this trip. I could just act as if all is well and see what happens when we return. Or, I could proactively start a serious [censored]-or-get-off-the-pot discussion.

Any suggestion?


Me: 45 WAW: 45 | M22 | T25 | No Kids
Nov 09 W Filed | Dec 09 Separation
Mar 17 2010 Divorce Papers Signed | Divorce Hearing Cancelled
Moved back home May 2010
PA Confirmed June 2010 | W left Dec 7 2010