Just wanted to point out that "co-dependance" is NOT a problem in a good relationship where one hand washes the other.
Ya reckon?
From quick wikipedia search: Codependency or codependence is a tendency to behave in overly passive or excessively caretaking ways that negatively impact one's relationships and quality of life.
It also often involves putting one's needs at a lower priority than others while being excessively preoccupied with the needs of others.
Codependency describes behavior, thoughts and feelings that go beyond normal kinds of self-sacrifice or care taking. For example parenting is a role that requires a certain amount of self-sacrifice and giving a child's needs a high priority, although a parent could nevertheless still be codependent towards their own children if the care taking or parental sacrifice reached unhealthy or destructive levels.
Codependency does not refer to all caring behavior or feelings, but only those that are excessive to an unhealthy degree.
Codependency is never OK on this life journey. You can't have a "healthy" marriage if one or both of you is coodependent. In a relationship we are two individuals living as a team - not two individuals settling for less than our optimal life outcomes so we can caretake or control each other.
We are born alone and we die alone. Somewhere along the path, we need to learn to be alone and to look after and love ourselves rather than trying to get that sense of belonging and fulfilment from our marriage partner.
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
