For some reason, I think I'll be around this board for awhile. Not because I expect my sitch to require it, but because of the people here. I'm amazed at the dedication so many people have for helping others here, even when they've been successful with their own R. It's hard to read so much pain from newbies, but yet they still keep trying to help, knowing full well that most will ignore their hard learned lessons for too long. My hat is off to all the oldtimers.
(and yes, I hope to someday have a really happy ending to share like Coach and Greek)
Yeah, I'm surprised at how my expectations have really changed. I don't expect this to work out; I hope it does, but I know the odds, and I know my wife. It'll be really hard for her to forgive; it doesn't come easily for her. In some ways, I'm the one who had an affair with my computer! At least in her eyes. Of course I know that the computer was only one of many symptoms of a dysfunctional relationship.
But I hope things improve, and I'm making sure that I improve myself regardless of the outcome. My newest goal is emotional stability; not getting upset about things so much, being calmer around my girls, more sociable with coworkers, finding my sense of humor again. Heck, just flirting and joking with my wife has been a huge eye-opener; I can be funny! It's been so long since we joked around, that I had forgotten how fun it could be to tease and flirt.
But I don't want to fool myself. For every PDT/OIN/Coach & Greek/ Robx, there's probably 100 failures; failures regardless of the strategy used. This is really hard stuff to repair, even with the best of plans.
I have a dance date tonight with my W. I woke up excited about it, and I'm still excited about it. It may flame out, crash and burn; it may be a roman candle that ignites a new love between my W and me. I'm just going to have fun, enjoy some drinks, listen to some fun music, have a great conversation with my W, and hopefully not step on any toes! Anything else that comes of that is gravy.
[quote=Coach] Be "on" - make sure you talk to all her female friends, let them know you are going out dancing that night, compliment your wife in front of them
All superb advice, esp. the last part about complimenting her in front of them. ALL women love this and really love when it's done in front of our friends!!!! Do it, Pin!
And Soleil wasn't sure what a Cat Whisperer was. [/quote
Wife came home sick from work this morning with an upset stomach. She had it all last night, at least since I got home. So I'm not sure if tonight's dancing date will be on.
She could be having 2nd thoughts about the date. She could really be feeling unwell, because of 2nd thoughts, or just coincidence. I don't think she was faking the symptoms, but you never know.
Do I go by myself? Do I take her somewhere else instead of dancing? Do I reschedule for next week?
You were planning on going without her originally correct? Maybe its too early to decide, If you are home with her today, I would wait and see how she feels later and decide then. my 2 cents
Do I go by myself? Do I take her somewhere else instead of dancing? Do I reschedule for next week?
Quote:
Dorothy: Your Majesty, If you were King, you wouldn't be afraid of anything? Lion: Not nobody, not nohow! Tin Man: Not even a rhinocerous? Lion: Imposserous! Dorothy: How about a hippopotamus? Lion: Why, I'd trash him from top to bottomamus! Dorothy: Supposin' you met an elephant? Lion: I'd wrap him up in cellophant! Scarecrow: What if it were a brontosaurus? Lion: I'd show him who was King of the Forest! All Four: How? Lion: How? Courage! What makes a King out of a slave? Courage! What makes the flag on the mast to wave? Courage! What makes the elephant charge his tusk, in the misty mist or the dusky dusk? What makes the muskrat guard his musk? Courage! What makes the sphinx the seventh wonder? Courage! What makes the dawn come up like thunder? Courage! What makes the Hottentot so hot? What puts the "ape" in apricot? What have they got that I ain't got? All Four: Courage! Lion: Then you can say that again!
You lead. Make sure the kids are taken care of, she has what she needs then you go out. Your attitude needs to be one of taking care of your family and you have been looking forward to this for yourself. Expect to be tested.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
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