SO, I guess I'm back to asking myself this morning about the specifics. What are some practical ways that I can up the game in the 180s/GAL department? What are some ways that H would take notice and maybe bring back the attraction?
Maybe I shouldn't even be concerned with this, I don't know. I would say not if I hadn't been doing the other things for myself, but I have been. Been doing plenty for me and for the kids, so I feel good about that. But - the reason I'm here obviously is to save my marriage so I need to continue to work on that as well. Once H is back on board 100% I know how to proceed to address our issues and make the M the best it can be. My problem of the moment is to facilitate H getting to that point - of wanting the M without a doubt - in a more timely manner.
Take last night for instance. H is out of town. He texted me and said hi - asked how my day/night was. SO, that was nice. I answered back and told him about having lunch with a friend and how she and I were going to take some cooking classes... told him a bit about the boys... He responded with a few things from his day. I mentioned where I had lunch at and he replied that we would have to go there again.
It was a positive exchange but no hint of "lovingness" or that he missed me...anything like that. (And why did he text me instead of call?) Anyway, it's just an example of how things are right now: positive and friendly, but still emotionless. I'm very careful to only give back what I get. H doesn't say I love you so I don't. H doesn't make any attempt at loving guestures (like holding my hand or kissing me) so I don't make any attempt with him either.
I just want some ways to help the process of attraction come back! I mean heck: the other night when we went to the concert together I wore a new dress, got pretty spiffy, and he didn't even notice. Oh wait - he might have. However, if he did, it seemed more of an aggravation with me then "Dang she looks good." In fact, he may have even rolled his eyes! Why would he do that???
