40, sorry you are here. You are right that detaching is the next step for you. However, detaching is emotional, not neccessarily physical. Because if the kids, there will be a lot of physical contact, but once you achieve detachment, dealing with her through the kids will be easier.
You asked if om2 and om3 are script. Scripts vary but it's nit suprising that she has moved through 3 guys quickly. Her issue us within her, but she will seek addictive solutions(men, excessive drinking). The rush to divorce us just another sign of her internal pain that she feels if she quickly divorces you, she will feel better. She will not, but no one can convince her of that. She must discover this own her own. Her flaunting these OMs IMHO, suggests tremendous guilt and lack of respect for you. Prepare yourself for alot of drama, as she is gonna throw all blame at you, especially since you outed her to her parents. Your focus should be and in this order; you then the kids. You are first because you will need you strength and clear mind to take care of the kids. As fathers we typically in situations make the kids first and allow ourselves to suffer, only to eventually allow the kids to suffer because of exhaustion.
Detachment doesn't happen over night, it's a struggle in the beggining. But it will be the key in how this all turns out.
