Correct me if I have it wrong dear friends, but with a MLCer setting boundaries especially early on just pushes the MLCer further away because they feel that the spouse is still trying to control or fix them.
I think this is the crux of the difference between MLC board and the rest of the DB forum. The boundary must be set and enforced at some point. I believe, it is after replay is over or near the end of that stage. Now if you ask PDT he believes it should be set early in the crisis. What we see as controlling he see as necessary.
I would be interested to hear what other wise MLC board members would say.
