He hasn't brought it up lately. Well, not in the last several weeks anyway. I think he knows I'm done with taking that line of crud from him. I flat out told him awhile back that if he wanted to truly consider all of that, he needed to consider this: he KNEW I was depressed. I talked to him about it seriously several times and how - because of our lack of medical insurance - I didn't want to spend the money on therapy or doctors or medications... He KNEW and yet did nothing to help me during that time period. Well, one time he took a whole hour and a half and decided if I got more sun (Vitamin D) and exercised that I'd be better. I told him it was like I was in a pit and he didn't bother extending a ladder or do anything to help me out of it. If he REALLY wanted to consider my depression, he needed to come to the realization that he had failed me as a spouse too.
Oh: he basically told the FT that the whole depression thing was just a cop out - an excuse - for everything I'd "done wrong" anyway. Of course, that was several months ago now.
Point being, he stopped that line of talk after the kids told him he was wrong and I likened it to the pit he left me in. However, doesn't mean he still doesn't feel that way and just not saying it any longer because he knows none of us are hearing it! If he DOES still feel that way though, then it's a contributing factor as to why he 'fell out of love" or is so miserable, or whatever - in his opinion.
H doesn't care about wedding vows, obviously. He sees marriage as more of a contract, not a commitment.
Physically, H has been pretty darn healthy for 20 years except for a cold here or there or flu. Now, mentally and emotionally - that's different. I've obviously been VERY helpful when he was ill and left us for months when the kids were little...and when he needed to have the cyber-affair 13 years ago - and now, putting up with his MLC (that doesn't think he's having!)
