One more note on my hopes for another chance with Mr. A and what seems different now:
There have been a bunch of times since Mr. A left when I thought we might have chance to turn things around. Sometimes I made blatant bad judgments, like the time I hadn't seen him for over a month and then we finally got together and I put mucho pressure on him to move back in immediately. Obviously that did not happen! Or the time I sent him an email that just contained this link: