She tried to blame me for her experience. I asked her what it was I did wrong, and she was not able to articulatete it.
I think this is projection or deflection of some kind. She is pissy and puts that blame on you.
Hi Down, CL Another interpretation of when people try to blame others for their experience, is misplaced self-blame. Often it's the things we despise, judge and are angry with most in ourselves, that we accuse/blame others for feeling about us. (or is that what you were meaning by 'projection', Down?) The reason I think this is first, because of how self-conscious she seems to be when faced with the possibility of making a mistake in public; and second, because she was unable to articulate it, when CL confronted her and asked for specifics as to what she felt he did wrong. That's the crappy thing about low self-worth and self-awareness. It often comes out as... well...just like Down said... 'pissy'. Tough to stay respectful and compassionate around.
Granted, this is a very unhealthy way of relating and certainly doesn't justify what she's doing. I just wanted to throw the idea out there for consideration. I agree with Down that it's her job to learn what makes her happy and communicate respectfully. Just keep remembering your boundaries and don't accept that misdirected blame CL. Take care.
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
