In the latter case, embracing change--within reason and with an eye always toward efforts likely to yeild positive results--is the best path to progress.
In my personal case, I think I fall into the latter category. There is nothing left to be gained from not embracing the change, and there is much to be lost (time, money, peace of mind) by resisting change.
I like this. Unfortunately, some people just have a really hard time with change. My H for one gets completely stressed out. The bigger the change the bigger the stress.
We can't control everything. We can make goals and make efforts to reach them, but if the universe throws a wrench in your plans maybe there's a reason.
Enjoy the journey, not the destination.
He: WAH Me: LBW Precious: DD
~ I'm grateful for every day I have to improve the way I relate.
Time, that makes sense. Appreciate your thoughtful posts. Gatsby11 is trying to drop the rope in Newcomers... I wonder if you could look at the last couple of pages of her sitch and offer up comment. I meant to put you in that list of vets
Me 36; H 40 baby born in May M:13, T:15 Bomb (OW): Dec 09 began DBing: Feb WH overseas with OW old: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2027369#Post2027369
In the latter case, embracing change--within reason and with an eye always toward efforts likely to yeild positive results--is the best path to progress.
In my personal case, I think I fall into the latter category. There is nothing left to be gained from not embracing the change, and there is much to be lost (time, money, peace of mind) by resisting change.
I like this. Unfortunately, some people just have a really hard time with change. My H for one gets completely stressed out. The bigger the change the bigger the stress.
We can't control everything. We can make goals and make efforts to reach them, but if the universe throws a wrench in your plans maybe there's a reason.
Enjoy the journey, not the destination.
Very true, both posts. I'm one who resists change and need to embrace the fact I can't control everything. Getting there I hope, slowly but surely.
New thread: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2112303
I had the vets thread removed because I felt there was too much revealing information on there, and I was going public with some of you folks on the alt.
I admire the fact that so many folks here have fought so hard for their marriages. It restores my faith in the depth of human bonds.
Sometimes those efforts are successful in restoring a marriage, sometimes what looks successful at first doesn't stick, and sometimes the marriage isn't restored.
I think, however, that the fight is a good one so long as it isn't about outright denial about what is happening. I have learned a lot on this forum (and I have a lot left to learn no doubt).
My marriage, however, has moved from limboland onto the fast track to dissolution, and I think I just have to accept that. That doesn't mean I won't wonder about how it all happened sometimes, and that doesn't mean I won't have sad moments (especially around key events like the upcoming "getting served" and the eventual dissolution).
Sometimes things just don't turn out the way we might have wanted them to turn out. I know that it's not over until it's over, and I know that even then it's not over for some folks (especially those with kids). For me, on the other hand, I have to start living my life like it is over.
I will probably continue to post here even though some of this stuff is hard to read in the context of my personal situation, but I think it's OK for ME to let go.
Just read your initial start to this thread after seeing you post on mza8 thread.
Have you friended me on the alt? greatday tobe alive
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Monday STBXW called and wanted to "go do something". I asked her if she was up for a field trip. We went to Tennessee Safari Park.
I was licked by a girraffe and was uncomfortably close to a very hungry osterich while there. STBXW wanted to adopt an affectionate camel
So... long story made short: today she is putting big-D back on hold for now. We are going to Hot Springs, AR the weekend of the 24th to see the balloon festival and a free Clint Black concert. Got a nice suite on the other side of the lake there. Never been to Hot Springs before.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
