Hi Mila. I'm new to your thread, but just wanted to say that I add my positive vibes to all those who have been there for you since the beginning.
Take care.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
My wh still comes by, tries to get in, to share time, to reduce spending, to tell us how to live, all while not wanting to live with us or give up freedom! I like him less every day, though, that this goes on, for doing this to us. Do you feel that way too.
Meanwhile time passes, I grow stronger, like you, and time heals. Slide back some days, feel bad for the kids, think about the broken family that you talk of, and the helplessness of not being able to do anything about it. He has rationales in his mind that this is all OK. Amazing!
Glad to hear you had a nice trip, and that you and your D are doing well, and that your friend came to visit. Keep well. - SCh
Hi You!!! I wanted to drop in to say hi and to see how you are doing?
OLD THREAD-http://tinyurl.com/y98nuty Me 44 H 51 T 15 yrs M 9+ yrs No Kids "You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless you trust enough."
Thank you SA, WS, Lance, Eric, BeingMe, Kissak, SCH, DU.....Well my friends, I'm still alive....first of all my sincerest apologies to all of you that stopped by my tread....I'm sorry that I didn't reply for so long....I must confess that I did read your posts and really appreciated your caring, advice and support....yet I couldn't write....I just couldn't make myself. I guess I must be going through some evaluating/reevaluating period....I don't know. I have been thinking so much about everything, about the direction I want my life to take and I still don't know the answers. I'm at kind of crossroads...mainly has to do with business....don't know what to do, which way to go....trying to make the best decision.......Sometimes we are FORCED to make decisions....that doesn't make them the best decisions, but it may be the only choice available....I'll explain when I have time to recap what's been going on.
Have to go make dinner now.....
((((love you all))))
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
I don't know where to begin....First of all H is still in lala land....I did see him only once for business meeting couple of days after I came back from Europe...that's 3 weeks ago....he took D for lunch on her B-Day....that's 2 weeks ago...didn't see her since. He has been out of town again visiting OW for the past 2 weeks now. Didn't tell me that he is going. I sent him email requests for a business meeting and number of other e-mails pertaining to business...didn't get reply to any of them for 5 days. I was quite shocked, because this was the first time ever that he didn't reply to my business emails....
Our business is close to bankruptcy now....In July he was in Paris with OW for 2 weeks and in August he left town for another 2 weeks....no new business whatsoever....
Since I'm unable to meet with him for the past 2 weeks, in desperation I did send him some facts and figures....yet again ...warning him of the gravity of our financial situation....
His reply...."Well, August is usually slow I will meditate so our business will receive some work"
After hearing this I'm thinking my H has really lost his marbles....
I wanted to stay in the business with him thinking that that's a great way to maintain our connection and I didn't want to be the one to walk out on it....because I know that if I leave he would blame me if the business fails. I really feel that he is dragging me down financially....I don't know how long can I take this....knowing that every month we get deeper and deeper in debt.
He is just not capable running it right now....it makes me so sad....after 20 years in business.
I was hoping that I will be able to renew my license (I'm studying now) and ease out of the business slowly, but the way it is I'm not sure I have time for it....i may have to take a job and bail.....don't know what to do.....
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
First and foremost protect yourself and do whatever it takes to make sure you're secure financially. Your H is no help to you now and won't be for some time.
If/when you reconnect it won't have anything to do with the business anyway. If letting it go is what's best for you then do it. All he's going to do right now is run up debt. Separate at least that part of it for yourself so you're not responsible and paying anymore for his affair than you have already.
Your H can then feel what it really is not to have Mila in his life.
If you two eventually decide to get back together it will be with a brand new marriage that has to be built from the ground up anyway.
You have had businesses before with your H and you know that to be successful you both have to be 100% invested. Your H isn't capable of doing that right now.
Don't ever feel guilty for looking out for yourself. You're the only one who can.
