5) Ah, the foot rubs. Massages for us in the past were a form of foreplay. With the footrubs recently, I had her all lotioned up and was massaging her from her pelvis, thighs and hips to her feet. I guess I should stop since it's not going anywhere and just leaves her feeling in control and me frustrated at the end of everything.
What about like last night when she does stuff like asks me to rub her back cause it hurts from her looking at files all day. Then when I rub her back and work down to the lower part of her back she asks me to rub her a$$ more? She keeps saying how good it feels and I grab both cheeks and work them over good in my hands. Then when I move back to her back she asks for more a$$ rubbing. I mean WTF??? While I was doing it I thought, hey I don't mind this, I'm grabbing some booty and helping her feel better. But is that supplicating?? I don't see it as a boundary for me (to rub or not rub a$$), but it just seems a little weird that my sep W wants me to rub her a$$??
You don't mind rubbing her a$$ but yet you still have a feeling of being short changed, a feeling in your stomach area that says you are still being taken advantage of, a feeling that says you are being trained to believe that rubbing her feet is actually your reward not your wife's for your good behavior.
I have a fair amount of landscaping that needs to be done in my backyard, give me enough time, I will make you feel like I am rewarding you for allowing you to do this work and then maybe even get you to pay me for allowing you to do this landscaping work in my backyard ;-)
Your wife enjoys teasing you, it's an ego boost for her, she receives a lot of satisfaction from being able to pull your strings and make you do what she wants you to do. Since it's very easy for her to control you and your behavior, even though she enjoys the back rubs, the a$$ rubs, the foot rubs, do you believe her respect for you is growing during all of this activity or diminishing?
Can she love you if she doesn't respect you?
You are not a challenge, you do everything she asks and more.
Do you ever ask her for back rubs? Do you enjoy back rubs? Has she offered to give you back rubs, foot rubs, a$$ rubs?
If the answer is NO, have you asked yourself why not? She obviously knows these things are pleasurable, she enjoys them. I'm sure she knows that you would enjoy a back rub.
Here's a test...
tonight, tell her you're exhausted from work, you have a lot of lower back pain and would love a back rub to help relieve that tension in your lower back.
What will her response be?
"I'm tired"
"YOUR BACK?! Not really in the mood to rub YOUR back"
"I don't really feel comfortable rubbing your back, maybe things are moving too quickly, I don't want to give you false hopes about us, etc. etc."
Any other variations of the above 3 themes is also to be expected ;-)
