Kat, you asked for the rest of the story, I'll post it here if you don't mind.
My dad had an affair with someone just a tiny bit different than my mother--so weird!
My mom is a free spirit--very unconventional gal. She is in her late 60s and is still stunning to look at. Hardly any wrinkles. I hope I inherited those genes!
She is the life of the party and can be a lot of fun. Unfortunately, she is diagnosed manic depressive and refuses to take the drugs--so she is definitely a challenge and sometimes I can see why my dad was unhappy with her.
But, she did everything wrong when he did have the affair--I think she could have had him back but she cried, begged, let him cake-walk for YEARS and, well, in the end she didn't want him. (this was early 80s). But she was so, so scared. She had no degree, 3 kids, and had never worked outside the home. She married very young and was married to a high-powered attorney. The divorce was a court battlefield that took years to finish.
Dad was wracked with guilt all his life. He spoiled us terribly, and treated stepmom like dirt. She also is a bit of a nut.lol. I actually like her, but I don't mind getting digs in at her any time I can--if she doesn't like it? oh well. She was a big girl when she went for a married man with 3 kids!
They "had" to show the world that the affair "meant something" and she talks about that now--that that was a mistake!lol. And she is EVER so ashamed of it--she has a "boyfriend" and she wants me to not mention this stuff--uh, sorry, this is YOUR history, not mine, I'm not re-writing it!!!
She is much younger than my dad and he is in last-stage Alzheimers. She can't wait til he dies.lol. But her "boyfriend" keeps her in line--he is the handyman around their farm and is more her age, but he is a really awesome guy wtih very decent morals and my stepmom KNOWS that she cannot have an affair again--what the consequenses are and she wants the romance and the dates and the legitimacy this time.
Honestly, I don't think she'll snag this guy--he is way too good for her--down on his luck because of the economy but he will be something someday and I don't think he'll want her and do I feel badly about that???lol.
In the meantime she takes good care of my dad because "boyfriend" is watching her closely. He spoke to me about the drinking she starts in the afternoon, and I had some stern words with her that her "boyfriend" thinks it is terrible and she stopped.lol.
Funny enough, my great-grandmother abandoned her two kids--my grandmother and my great uncle--and had an affair and married the guy and she too regretted that decision. You just swap one set of problems for a whole new set, and you have a nice case of "guilt for the rest of your life" on top to deal with.
Aren't you blessed by having no guilt? I know I am!!!
