Congratulations on the pregnancy, unexpected blessing though it is.
It sounds to me that your H is immature, abusive, and takes out his bad moods on you. This is not to say that he couldn't change, just that the way he is behaving at the moment is unacceptable.
HD people can feel tense and irritable when going without sex, it seems. However, that's absolutely no excuse for lighting into you, or your children, or anyone else. He needs to own his own feelings, sexuality, etc. Also, in the give and take of marriage, he needs to understand that you ALSO have needs which he must meet (for support, unconditional love, acceptance, etc) in order for you to feel able to ML.
If you have time to read, I'd suggest David Schnarch's Passionate Marriage. Also, you mention that putting boundaries in place before turned H's behaviour around. Would it be possible to use boundaries again?
