(((Punkin))) honey, one thing you have to realize is that MLC isn't a process that resolves quickly. The reason you are down is that you had expectations when you sent that email.
Your H is in no frame of mind at this point but to see you as the enemy. That's his burden to bear, not yours. You did what you had to do to protect yourself financially. He doesn't realize this yet but you protected him too.
If/when you decide to divorce him and he goes ahead with that kind of deal there won't be anything you can do, but at least it won't affect your financial future.
A wise person advised me to separate the business from the emotional. Punkin you took care of the business end. The emotional end will change sometimes day to day.
Dust off little lady. You did what you had to do to take care of you. YOU are the only one who can right now.
I hope you sent the message for YOU and not for him. If so, then you should only expect yourself to feel better, not him. That's how it was with me. Just keep that in mind.
"Love me when I least deserve it, for that is when I need it the most"
M18 Me39,H42 D16 Bomb 1/10 Moved out 3/10 OW 6/10 H wants to R,OW gone 11/10 H moves back 5/11 H wants to wear rings again 9/11
Well, now he knows there's a light in the window. It may grow dim, but it's there for now. And, you have been able to express your love, even if it wasn't reciprocated.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
I say fuc* that! Your not defeated. You may be down...hell we all have those days (note my recent post)...but You my lady are FAR from being defeated. Far from it.
You don't feel spunky, you don't feel too happy today, you don't feel to strong, you don't feel this or that...
Guess what tomorrow...next week...in 15 minutes YOU can CHOSE to feel different.
That is right...your choice. Not mine..not your H only yours Punkin.
I see the spunk in you still. I feel it...I even feel it when you are posting one of these I feel defeated posts. Now get up girl...
Pick yourself up. Put on the big girl panties or thong if you are like me and keep working on PUNKIN.
God Bless, Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Oh...and as Being said...he knows there is light and that the light is you. Question is when will he decide to walk toward the light. You cannot decide or control when he does this. You can only control how long that light remains lit.
Ready to give up or ready to keep pressing on for what YOU WANT..for WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN. That belief is a belief in YOU!
FTR - I believe if YOU.
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
I thought your comment about the ride being over was intersting. I'm still kind of waiting for that. I say kind of because the bad days really are alot fewer, farther between and not nearly as bad. I still do have one now and then though.
Thanks everyone for all the support. I don't know what I'd do without this site to come to. You are all so supportive and wise and can help me see what is in front of my face but can't see.
Yes, I've been down the last week or so. Now that there is a court date, I can't help but worry about financial matters, i.e., he refuses to sign so we can put the house up for sale. Thinks the judge will just auction it off. We'd lose everything if that happened, and probably still owe on it. I can get a re-fi, but why do that when I don't want to stay here anyway?
August just seems to never end. His silence is just what I need right now to gain back my perspective and stamina. Wait, make that his silence and a 12 pack of Bud lite w/ lime.
A 19 year old young man I work with started back to college today, and came to work with an essay written in 1971 by Judy Brady called I Want a Wife, required reading for his World Literature Class. Said it made him think of me. It's a hoot! Especially for us girls.
