Questions for HD's

[LRT Land]

Short summary of my sitch - years of ssm following M that started with H's verbal/emotional abuse. I put boundaries in place and that pretty much stopped. Big blow up this summer resulted in H hiring a lawyer who sent me a letter out of the blue stating H wants a D. I read DR and dropped the rope while doing 180s, which eventually turned things around.

Let me mention that throughout our M I've tried to improve the ssm problem. I've always had to be the intiator. My hormones were screwed up after my first child was born. I've always been assigned all the blame.

Now, at an older age I find myself pg and while struggling with what to do we haven't had sx in 5 days and H blew up again. He does have narcisstic and borderline tendencies. When he gets in these moods he is very selfish and spouts mean stuff.

Before this pg happened (which I obviously didn't create on my own) we were having sx a few times a week. I'd be happy with 1-2 times a week. Hormones have gotten better following diet and exercise - supplementation never did squat.

So my question is, is he so HD wired that even going a few days without even in the face of a crisis that it spins him into this horrible person? I need to know if that happens to other HD's or if he has some wires crossed. His reaction is making me question whether I want to continue this M. At a time when I really need support, I'm getting blame, a cold shoulder and nastiness. I'm tired.