Are you envisioning a reconciliation where it's not a problem for him if you treat his mother coldly?
during the marriage, she cried to get her way and lied about me to my h (said i was mad and mean to her when i wasn't).
How do you know she was lying? Isn't it possible that she perceived your actions as 'mean'? Were you mad?
after h declared it was over, she took liberties at me and was disrespectful towards me in my own home.
What did she do or say?
reconciliation doesn't mean that i'd be sacrificing my self-worth to be a doormat to h and his family. i will not do that for my h or for my m. Do you equate being nice to someone with being a doormat? Do you also think that being cold is 'standing up for yourself'?
Are you saying that if you reconciled, your H would have to understand that you would never again be nice to his mother because the way you demonstrate self worth is to hold a grudge and punish the offender indefinitely?
