I"m so glad I posted here! Journalling and hearing your responses is helping me to see the pattern.
So after I felt I let my guard down a "little" last night, there was a cost today. I can't prove it's related, but it seemed like it wouldn't be a coincidence.
Planning a party tonight for S5 who is starting kindergarten this week. I ended up taking FIL all day so I figured H could help out. Also, since he's been on his good behavior he's offered numerous time to swing by the store, etc.
So we're talking on the phone this afternoon planning dinner. He offered to pick up the cake I ordered. I call back a few minutes later and ask if he'll call to have a pizza delivered. He asks for a specific order and I give it.
Then the classic thing happens - he gets irritated sounding and cuts me off saying "whatever, I'll figure it out. I gotta go." and rushes off the phone. Curt tone, and it hurts.
It's small, but it cuts deep when it happens over and over through the years. It's also a small example of a similar way he talks to me in a bigger way when there are blow outs. Also, in the past, even this might lead to a fight if I bring up how he hurt me with his tone, asked to spoken to nicer, or asked what was wrong.
I've gotten the best treatment lately by ignoring him and disappearing. I couldn't do that tonight, it was the party.
However I noticed him arguing with his dad over the time it would take him to get to the airport in the morning. No matter how much his dad insisted he wanted to get there early, H kept saying "I'm telling you...it's_______(this way)." He was relentless and wouldn't stop arguing and insisting he was right.
Thank you Universe, for reminding me why not being with my H is a GOOD IDEA.
