Anybody is welcome to disagree! I wasn't suggesting you start a debate/argument about the yard (or anything for that matter). I was suggesting (using the yard as an example, something tangible) that you start letting your H take care of his things even though they might still be part of you. The example that seemed easiest was the yard.
I understand you need to talk to your H about parenting things (obviously) but all this other discussion he tries to initiate is really due to his guilt. Don't indulge him because it does prolong your pain. I am not saying you are on the floor crying in total angst but all these little "things" take a toll in the midst of many life changes (divorce, going back to work, son in daycare and so on). The major life changes you have to deal with but all this other "stuff" is unnecessary ESPECIALLY when you feel "hmmmm, H is acting odd". You don't need it!
They yard sort of stood for a much bigger outlook - I guess I could have articulated that better.
Mr. New Mamma has been talking about this yard for some time. Do something or shut up about it but stop using it as a way to "talk". And maybe before it was okay but now it really is a new phase... lots of life changes happening and it's time for Mr. NM to be on his own and stop including NM when it suits him.
NM - if you feel like you need to cry in conjunction w/feeling "puzzled" by your H's actions it is time to retreat further. You have been strong and you need to stay strong as you finalize the divorce, return to work and learn how to adapt and thrive with what is coming up for you.
