She's in MLC, but I was weak. Now what?

[crushednstuck]

WarriorShadow, You are my Home Depot brother! I've been gone from the forum as I've been working to complete yet another awesome home improvement project. It's looking awesome, but as you've said, it won't be enough, never is. However, I do agree with W that having the chop saw and pneumatice nailer around the 5-year old is not cool. I've got to end the project so I can actually enjoy myself on the weekends. I'm guilty of some yearning for self-expression in my projects (artsy side of caveman). The satisfaction of feathering the nest is personally rewarding (guilty!) but I know she loves it. However, she says "we" did the improvements. She complains, I work.
How does she remember these times and dates over years? The MC asks for examples of why I feel the way I do...alone, frustrated, unappreciated, etc and I can't produce one.
I'm beginning to thing the MC is totally on board with W because I'm not the raging talker. I don't think of myself of some bound up neandertal, but when you're talked over constantly it's hard not to come unhinged. I honestly think the MC is baiting me for a reaction too.
It's one step forward two steps back again. Like a psycho Paula Abdul video. Detachment is constantly challenged by kid issues, and her feeling that I'm not emotionally rewarding is constantly fueled by the detachment.
Grit's given good advice to drop the rope. But, I sometimes can't help the urge to defend myself.
I appreciate the feedback all, and am back for more. Though the project is not completely done yet.