I hear your frustration... my H was famous for the "you should just know" bit. And really that is a communication issue I think.
It is very easy to get locked in one way of doing things and feeling resentful about it. But resentful thoughts really are up to the individual to own. Once resentful thoughts start they manifest quickly and things will not turn out good unless they are addressed. Sadly though most people are unable to really work through resentment in a healthy way.
Some people (me!) find it very difficult to ask for help. I am not sure if it means feeling more vulnerable or what.
It is really hard to know what to do when communication is not really flowing in the best way. I think most of us sort of go by trial and error and work really hard to extract the positives while addressing the negatives. It's NOT an easy balance though!
