Relocated the family and he dropped the bomb

[MM78]

Thanks Steady. I'm glad you think it was ok (and not pursuing or anything).

To help you all understand a little more of the complicated dynamic I have to reveal a bit more about our situation. The grieving I mentioned in the email was due to his brother's suicide. That was a horrible but critical point in our marriage. His brother and my youngest sister had dated for 3 months after we got married, they broke it off, and three weeks later he took his life. H's family blamed my sister instead of looking at the other obvious reasons why. H has told me he doesn't blame her and nothing could have prevented it. He said his brother gave them all signs and no one is to blame but everyone should have seen it coming. This all came to a head at my baby shower when his sister and cousins attacked my sister (a very Springer moment indeed). After that he cut off contact with his sister. I feel this is part of why he says he 'gave up everything for me'. At that time I told him I would never prevent him from seeing his sister or taking his child to visit his family, but please don't ask me to go to visit with them. I did not want a relationship with her. Since then I have tried to be cordial to her for all our children's sakes and she has denied me.

Last night one of the things I said briefly was that I know you feel you gave up everyone for me, but I want you to know I never asked you to give up anyone - until now. I know you did what you thought was best, but you did that on your own without asking me.

So that adds to the complicated story of how we got here and also how being 500 miles away from all of those people is a huge thing right now. We both came here with the idea of wanting a better life and focusing on our own family and not the mess between our families.