You can't have everything, where would you put it?

[ClingingToHope]

Sent STBXW an email with the name and phone number of who I called. So she can run with it there.

I think I know why I'm a mess today. I will be having a very fun weekend. But this is the weekend of the county fair. Last year I had the girls on the Sunday of the fair -- I didn't go. Not really my crowd.

As I was leaving with the girls, STBXW asked if I was going to the fair. I said no. I wondered why.

A couple of days later the person I had lived with for a couple of months called me up. By chance, he was at the fair and saw STBXW there getting on the back of some guy's motorcycle.

That was the first time an OM even entered my thought process. I thought it was just depression issues. I weakly confronted her on it a couple of nights later on the phone and she said he was just a friend.

Of course, now she just got back from the week-long Harley Davidson trip where "friends" taught her how to ride a motorcycle.

So even though I expect to have a GREAT weekend -- I can't get STBXW and another fair trip out of my head.

This is a longtime weakness of mine. Not only do I have to be happy -- the people that wronged me have to be miserable.

Forgiveness???? I have a long way to go.