not to be a richard, but that is recommending more of the same behavior. Recall the letter.
Quote:
I felt I wasn't worthy of your help during the day, patience, listening, talking, doing things as a family,
you need to show her you changed. and every minute with her and the kids is precious. or else someone else will be mowing her lawn and tossing a football with your boy on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and every other weekend and she'll be staring out the window wondering why didn't Dan do that.
The arguing over money and threats about who is getting the house and kids didnt do you any good. Realize the third times is NOT always the charm.
btw the above story is true.
Thanks Steve, I do appreciate the perspective. I did mow the lawn though!!
I am having trouble figuring out how to be her friend, but not really her friend, which I told her would happen if we got divorced. She seems to want to talk with me and things are generally pleasant and even fun when we do, but then she always reverts back to getting divorced anyway, so I don't feel like being her friend will help. I mean it would be very easy to do, but that is not what I want. I don't want to be only her friend. I need to have a more intimate relationship.
When I started to do all the things she complained about, then that was too much for her to handle too. I was "smothering" her. Another woman also told me recently that when she complained to her husband and he started doing all the stuff, it made her feel worse about the situation, like she couldn't handle it or something, even though he is just trying to help. Why can't these damn women just tell us what they want us to do? Things would be so much easier. I want to do it, I just can't read her mind, especially when she sends mixed or intentionally incorrect signals.
I just don't know. I think I am going to go with Coach's advice for now and see how things go. That doesn't mean I can't help her in a couple of weeks if things haven't progressed much in that time.
