Relocated the family and he dropped the bomb

[MM78]

Should I say you have until Monday to conclude all contact with her?

This weekend should I ask him to go stay in a hotel, ignore him around the house, or take the kids and go visit a friend?

I thought I was so prepared to be non-negotiable and the gravity of the situation and my sleeping babies in the next room turned me back to mush. I don't want them thinking this is acceptable. He has said he is trying to get her to go away, and obviously he is being too nice about it. If he has until Monday maybe he can feel that he wrapped things up with her in a way that he is satisfied with and that comes from him so it won't be a 'you took her away' thing. He feels that he's had to give up everything to be with me and lost his friends and family because of my. Ironically, I feel similarly that I gave everything up for him. Who's right? No one, but we both feel that way. He is going to add this to things to resent me for if I force him to make her gone NOW vs when he's ready. But I also can't wait forever.

I'm sorry if I'm so dense about this. I thought I had it all clear and figured out yesterday.