CD just because you aren't facilitating the D process doesn't mean you aren't moving away.
I'm contesting my D - she has to prove grounds. Why am I doing that? On one hand it could look like pursuing and trying to force her into staying M, but there are other reasons than that.
My actions and my words outside of the legal maneuvering leave her no doubt I am on my boat sailing off. I have not slammed any door shut, I've just stopped looking at the damn door.
I haven't facilitated any of the legal mumbo jumbo we've already been through. She's initiated everything. Every time she makes a direction change, I follow along and maneuver inside of that new direction to protect myself and my children.
MySitch Me-47 STBXW-41 D-5 S-8 ILYBNILWY-01/08 Want a D- 01/09 Physical Sep-01/10 D filed-06/10 Got 50% custody=09/11 Ride that wave!
For 23 years my Wife ruled the house and she approved all decorations. I only had control of one room and one closet. But I was happy and in love with a slob and could care less.
Now it's all mine to do with as I please. I am having a field day. Only bad thing is that new furniture is very expensive.
Ill get there. Hey can somebody help me hang this old rifle over my firplece please? And hand me some of those rusty nails!
Me:48 W:55 M:22 T:23 Bomb:19Nov09 S:15Jan10 D:11Feb10 EA:Confirmed on 20Apr10 Fast track to her divorcing me
you may not realize this, but you've done a good job with dropping the rope. Examples are: Not snooping on W and her whereabouts. Not talking to the OM's W. Not using eBlaster. That is what dropping the rope is all about...not getting too attached on what the WAS does or does not do.
You're right. I didn't realize this at all.
Originally Posted By: Wonka
... keep on working your goals that you posted. Focus on you....act as if. Live your life. Do not initiate any contact with W unless absolutely necessary...related to D and joint finances until you get the firewall in place. She will wonder what you are up to and be mysterious if she asks. Don't tell her in detail what you are doing or even up to.
And there's that component I was looking for. Couldn't see that either.
Thanks.
I think Missher said on his post that it's easier to see what is working and what is not when you aren't in the middle of it.
Sure glad somebody else can see what's happening clearer than I can. I have to get better at seeing more objectively so I can see where I am.
Word of caution: When it does come crashing down And it will... Try not to laugh in her presence. They don't like it I can tell you.
Well, I'm glad you guys are all so certain an implosion is coming. W can be pretty stubborn. Though it may not be her decision either. Wouldn't THAT be the kicker? I don't know if she's ever been dumped. EVER. No danger of me laughing. Feeling pretty empathetic toward her now. Like watching a train wreck from a distance. Feel bad it's gonna happen but I can't do anything from here. And the irony is SHE put me here.
Originally Posted By: Truegritter
You may think you can't do this because the pain and anger is pretty fresh...You can. It will get easier the more you practice.
It is fresh still. Not that long ago. But the less I see her, the better I get and the easier it seems to be. I've never been as strong in front of her as I am "here" but each time I get better. Soon reality will be identical to theory.
I have been getting great advice. I have been so lucky that several pro's glommed on to me for some reason.
Thanks for the continued votes of confidence and support.
PS I always found parades kind of boring. Fireworks? THAT's got CD written all over it!
