I don't doubt you are very intelligent and filled with good ideas but I think, for men, especially that can often be an obstacle with women.
I actually just thought about my dad when I was reading your posts. Today is his b-day. He would have been 63. He died in Dec. of 2006. When I got my first job out of college I was in a carpool so I didn't drive my car to work each day. I was living at home at the time and one day my dad called me at work to tell me he noticed a crack in my windshield. Now why that couldn't wait until I got home I don't know. When I got home I didn't see a crack so I asked him about it... his response "don't worry, dad got it fixed for you". I WAS FURIOUS! Who told him to fix it? NOBODY! But he could not have been more proud of himself that he did. I hope if my dad is in heaven he is reading this now so he knows I finally "get" why he did that.
Men often try and "fix" out of love. I get that. You only wanted the best for your W and you wanted to do anything to help her dreams and ambitions come to fruition. I don't know what the balance is because even though "fixing" grates my last nerve I do see how lovely a gesture it is.
