I agree with the above. And I see that in a more clear fashion now then I ever did. My H had a snake of an attny and that is exactly what he did. He knew I was very ill during our litigation and in a very severe health crises and he used that to his advantage. Or I should say he tried to. Thankfully I chose an attny who had next to no tolerance for attnys like my H had.
It's unfortunate but you are not in a position of power now and you are going to have to REALLY figure out how to change that very, very soon. Without a job, an income, the ability to support your children, a vehicle of your own and a NON aggressive attny (not sure how aggressive your attny is but he/she sounds pretty passive) your W will continue to roll you. That is evident by her having her boyfriend bring her home to the place she lives with her husband and children.
Your W's actions don't shock me much as my H was very much the same way. He seemed to feel the COURTS decisions were not something he really had to follow if he didn't feel like it. The fact that your W had the balls to show up at a hearing w/o an attny speaks volumes on how little she is concerned about being held accountable for anything.
I would be VERY clear with your W and give her one warning...
W: if the money you are required to give me for spousal support is not in my hand by the close of business today I will move forward with legal action and ANY opportunity to further discuss our final settlement/dissolution will no longer exist.
Do not argue, be an ass or anything else when you say this. If she does not comply have her wages garnished tomorrow (or get that ball in motion).
You are going to have to get VERY tough and move towards a role your W is not used to seeing you in.
