Piano, the problem with your husband is his solution to guilt is to run away FURTHER... He admits his choices hurt people but he HIDES rather than OWNS those choices.
CHILDREN do this... They break something int he home, you interrogate them, they cry, yell, and then run away...
This is NOT adult behaviour he's showing.
You can send him the material, the greatest risk is he may just read it HIS WAY since its not being read WITH him by a FT. That material may just give him more ammunition to run... Penny Tuppy is pretty rough on infidelity, she doesn't pull punches. And your H scatters like a deer when the boxing gloves come out.
I shared material with my wife many times during her affair. She just blew it off and told me family therapists are just trying to "brainwash" people. That was the extent of her effort there... She DID look at it... But only to verbally dismiss it to me.
Do I think it made an impact? IN my case yes, my wife has a degree in psychology... I think she KNEW on some level that what she was reading carried a great deal of weight, but she would'nt admit that to me at all...
Just be warned of two things I can see coming of this you might not like :
a. YOur H may misinterpret the material to your disadvantage b. He may find Michele Davis' site and your threads here.
I have seen about a half dozen posters on this forum who had their spouses find their threads on here... Did a lot of damage...
