You have to give her the rope. I'm not sure I did the right thing with my wife, but the change in her only came when I told her to GTFO. I don't know what she thought after that, cuz I don't want to mind read. But her actions are pretty clear that she wants to do MC as long as she can.
Your wife has you by the scrotum, and until you remove her hands, she'll control you. You have to decide what you want, what your boundaries are, and how to fit them all into your worldview and faith.
