John, Coach is correct. A "R talk" -- as definited by MWD -- really refers more to ongoing relationship talks. Temperature-checking. "What are your intentions?" Blaming. Re-writing marital history. Etc.
There's nothing wrong with firmly establishing right up front what your BOUNDARIES are, as Coach suggests here. That's not "R talk" -- that's WHERE YOU STAND, your "Boundary of Personal Integrity."
Puppy
P.S. After I did this with my wife, and she refused to respect my #1 boundary of "no open marriage" (she did respect my smaller boundaries like "no phoning OM from inside our home," or "no phoning or texting OM in front of me or the kids," etc.), I then had the perfect "out" for why I insisted on no R talks. "I will not discuss our marriage with you as long as you've made the unilateral decision to invite a third person into it, by having an affair" became my position, and I was absolutely UNWAVERING in that.
