I know I have to take baby steps in here. I know her so well. She is trying to reach out to me because she does no longer understand my state of mind. That's why she is confused.
In the past when emotional outbursts like the recent one happened, I reacted to them. I would not speak for days. I got angry and tried to defend myself or question her motives. I clanged onto her words and repeated them back to her questioning the validity of her statements.
Now I only said "I'm sorry for how you feel." When it was over, it was over. No reaction, no anger - like it never even happened.
It is amazing how that works.
On the other hand I still have a deadline to tell her what I think of all this. I can't put that off.
She wanted me to bring up the 2 dogs for a swap in the middle of the week while she's vacationing and asked me to stay overnight. I was planning on taking the next day off.
I am torn about that. Part of me really wants to do that. It would be 4 days into her peaceful and tranquil vacation and I am very curious to see how she's doing at that point. Maybe she would initiate some talk since we are away from our routines. We have always had the best time when vacationing.
But I have to be very careful with my reaction/response and I know that.
At the same time everything seems so far away. Every day is different and unpredictable. What seems right today will be wrong tomorrow and vice versa. It's a rollercoaster.
