wife, I am so sorry you are going through so much pain right now. I am very distressed and vulnerable myself and I won't come to see (bub) on Wednesday before I go. I feel fragile and I can't cope with another outburst of grief. Please don't be mad at me, and more importantly don't blame yourself for this. Is is not your fault, it is just the situation that is too difficult right now for both of us, especially just days before I go. I hear your questions and your need for answers. I will write to you from (country) in the future, and hopefully one day we will be able to discuss what happen to our couple, in peace and calm. I hope also I'll find a job as son as possible so I can rapidly support myself, and support you with (bub). Above all, look after yourself, as I know you are looking after (bub) wonderfully. husband.
