Exactly!! That is why you drop the rope and GAL until you pass out.
lol. maybe we shouldn't encourage it like that.
"Tom's really working hard to show me he can get by without me. Last weekend the cops found him against a dumpster in an alley and this Sunday he spent the entire day sleeping on the couch with a bucket. He's a keeper."
If W comes out of MC no different 2 days from now, it's time to drop the rope and GAL. That's my plan.
Even though you should be doing that now. I'm going to hold u to that.
YOU sound STRONGER. Which is good. Dont let LOVE blind you.
Thanks! I feel stronger than two months ago. But, I don't feel as strong as I was before I met my W, which I was REALLY strong and confident at that time. I know I can get back there though.
So, I guess hold me to it. After Wednesday I'll either be in Piecing, or be right back here. Either way, I suppose I'll have to befine with either outcome. Obviously, I hope to move my thread.
Last edited by john28; 08/16/1008:26 PM.
----"Et tu, Brute?"---- me:28 W:24 S4 T:6 M:4 EA Exposed: 5/21/10 Bomb: 6/20/10 (Father's Day) NC w/ OM: 7/10/10 W moved out 8/21/10 http://bit.ly/aOrZne - My sitch
Definitely sounds hypocritical. So call her on it. Remember men have BOUNDARIES. You are fighting for RESPECT right now.
I agree that it's hypocritical. We talked about transparency, and she agreed to everything except FB, pwd, until after MC on Wednesday. Well, does that give her the right to go through my phone?
I just know if I confront her on this, she's going to try to twist and turn it on me to make me be the bad guy.
Well well, I hate to eat my own words, but... guess what, she did exactly what I thought she would when I confronted her about my phone.
I asked her nicely, "Did you go through my phone?" She replied that she had. I asked her why she did so, and she said, "Because you went through mine this morning."
If I was even half as smart as I am right now after the fact, I would have stopped the conversation then and there. I didn't touch her phone at all. I was respecting her boundaries. I did not even as much as look at her phone. So of course, dumbly I replied:
"I did not!" she then fired back, "Yes you did, don't lie to me, you went through my phone this morning." I then was on the defensive about going through her phone, and she had totally deflected all of the problems that I orignally went to her with (Hey, you went through my phone W). Instead I'm sitting here defending myself on why I didn't go through her phone.
Anyways, so I'm all defensive. Told her there was no way I didn't go through her phone. She said whatever - I don't believe you. She then said she just went through my phone because I went through hers. I told her that if she was concerned about me breaking her boundaries, she should have talked to me about it, not done the same thing back. She said, "Whatever, it's over, I said sorry."
I almost blew up, but I didn't. I told her then that she shouldn't have done that, because I was respecting her boundaries and she owed me the same. She then replied back with, "Stop scolding me like a child, DAD. I told you I was sorry, I don't scold you when you do something wrong. So let it go."
Finally I said, "I won't tolerate this crap behavior."
"Scolding me again like a child, controlling me...." she replied. I just let it drop.
30 minutes later we had calmed down and I told her that it is possible that I shouldn't have jumped down her throat as much as I did. She said that she was sorry she assumed I went through her phone and then went through mine.
So, like I said. She made me into the bad guy. JUST LIKE I SAID IT WOULD HAPPEN. And you know what? I think that when i confronted her, she just made up the lie of someone or 'something' going through her phone to deflect blame.
WTF is going on in my house?
Last edited by john28; 08/16/1011:38 PM.
----"Et tu, Brute?"---- me:28 W:24 S4 T:6 M:4 EA Exposed: 5/21/10 Bomb: 6/20/10 (Father's Day) NC w/ OM: 7/10/10 W moved out 8/21/10 http://bit.ly/aOrZne - My sitch
Well well, I hate to eat my own words, but... guess what, she did exactly what I thought she would when I confronted her about my phone.
So you knew what was going to happen and she still played you?
What boundaries of hers are you respecting?
Quote:
So, like I said. She made me into the bad guy. JUST LIKE I SAID IT WOULD HAPPEN. And you know what? I think that when i confronted her, she just made up the lie of someone or 'something' going through her phone to deflect blame.
Worked like a charm.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
"Stop scolding me like a child, DAD. I told you I was sorry, I don't scold you when you do something wrong. So let it go."
ouch. in the words of the late Redd Foxx
YOU BIG DUMMY!
what I think is wrong with your house is that your wife is just a child. just a young naive somewhat spoiled little girl. And you lack control and confidence in the situation and when you stand up for yourself, HA! you're DAD.
and things are not good and you don't have sex and she is bored and despises the situation and she is playing games with you and seeing how much she can get away with now, because she pretty much got away with armed robbery already. maybe worse. and when we try and point that out to you, you defend her. then she verbally beats you and you are saying sorry.
did you know all that about chatroulette that coach pointed out?
The sooner you reject her the sooner she is going to have to grow up and realize if she loves you and can treat you decently as a wife, or go, find who she is, and grow up.
Quote:
- She says, "I know you are a good man. I just don't know if you're the right man for me."
Quote:
She said that while the EA was still going on in the beginning after bomb day, if that makes sense. Hasn't said that since.
Bomb day was Father's Day. That was only a few weeks ago. And still there are secrets and passwords and you don't really know who she is talking to. And it doesn't read like she is even a bit remorseful. And you can't have sex with her even though you are shaving her. Now you are "Dad" ?
There is a great big world out there. John. If she is out there exploring it. You really should too. You might realize who you are. Who you are becoming and why getting out of a bad situation like this quickly is better in the long run for you.
Gucci and Rob have some great speeches. I am more for saying little and making riddles. Find your "jealousy button" or better yet find yourself someone that thinks you are the right man for them. Enjoy their company for a while. It will open both yours and her's eyes.
