ok, so I've not let go as well as I felt I had. Still ready to let go, just have to wait for it to happen,
on another note, I sort of backed into an R talk by accident today. W had been pissy all morning with me and the kids. She went out last night (no idea where or whom with - didn't ask) anyway I had enough and when I cought her upstairs later asked her why she had to be that way with the kids. Her response threw me but I think I recovered ok.
She said that I seem to be happy, like nothing is even wrong. (I have been in a really good frame of mind today, don't know why) I said, no actually everything is wrong, in fact I'm not sure how it could be more wrong, but I have had to accept that you want D and will not be changing your mind so I have to move on.
She started crying. Told her that I was changing for me, I did not want to repeat what I've done to her in my next R, be it with her or some one else. And if she decided on a second chance she will know that it will not be a repeat of what has happened.
She was actually crying very hard then, said she was sorry and that she has noticed how much I've changed.
I told her I was sorry for what I had done and am sorry she feels the way she does. I then went downstairs. She was much nicer after that.
We moved some stuff out of the house and she was very talkative and pleasant to be around.
So, what is this, guilt or is she starting to see whats happening, or is it just more mind games?
