I have an excellent MC. I'll make an appointment tomorrow after my colonoscopy (yay!).
I'm keeping expectations low. I know that she could be just be scared of losing her soft cushion. But I really don't think so. I know mind reading is bad, but when she was speaking about being scared of things returning to our old R, I could tell she was being honest and speaking from the heart.
And she really understood that I had accepted my part in the past, and that I wasn't the same guy anymore. I know that WAS often backslide, and their confusion makes them do things they regret later, but I hope that's not the case.
Last night, she said that she's so confused, and that days like Sat (when we spent a lot of time together) make her want to stay with me. And today was pretty much the same type of day. One day at a time.
I had expected her to pullback this morning; was all prepared to act "as if." But she didn't. She acted as if she wanted to be with me. With my daughters. As a family.
Last night when we were hugging, there was no holding back. It was the first time in probably 6 years when we held each other like that. Neither of us are used to that, and there was no hesitation on her (or my) part.
