put your foot down on the S issue. She has no right to keep info about your S hidden from you. I hate when parents do that, the kids are innocent in all this, and as much as I am going through with my own sitch, W and I are civil in regards to our kids. Anyway you do need to set a boundary in regards to your S, do not let her control you like this, she obviously knows this upsets you and you need to stand up to her "no doormat".
