WAW still around, DBing starting to work

[gutwrenching]

Will be starting a new thread in piecing soon.
Short version - from the second our true S started, before either of us had ever even found a place to live - she started to doubt her decision and reality finally hit.
I took the advice of Gucci and Steve McQueen and made sure she knew I was letting her go...and things changed quickly.

In her words - the reality of what I was doing finally hit me and I didn't like it. I didn't like who I had become. I didn't like what OM had turned me into. I wanted my H, my M, my family back. And then you were distancing yourself quickly, you wouldn't even answer my texts for hours, and I didn't like it. My gut was telling me I was doing the wrong thing. Combine that with pressure from OM and OM starting to act "like an @shole#$" and I got the "I wish I had never met him. He almost ruined my life. I thought it was what I wanted, it took the reality of you driving away with the kids to make me realize I was wrong and had to break it off immediately, for good, for real this time"

Lots of other talks/boundaries/debates between this and now that I won't spell out. I have transparency now, she ended EA with OM, and we are working on rebuilding things. We are currently at our new location and looking for one place for our entire family without any hesitancy. Both committed to rebuilding a new M that is stronger and better than before.

In the end, it was a combo of all the great advice from a bunch of great people and friends and vets that got us to this point. Combo of letting go, being the better option, crisis of the move, reality of being on her own, and getting some medication for depression...that led us to this point.

A little over 8 months after the bomb was dropped, there is true hope now