Well, guys. I did it. I deleted all of the texts from stbx yesterday. At first I was deleting 1 and 2 here and there and then finally I just hit "delete all." That was a huge thing for me.
Spy, I am going with the L I found. Going to meet w/ him today and he said he will include something saying stbx will be responsible for legal fees.
Q: are legal fees just the D fees or the entire L thing?
Romeo, I have called a gazillion L places and NONE of them offered a free consulation, all $200 and upwards (closer to $300 actually just for the consult).
The "Divorce by bed and board" is hilarious (the way stbx filed). Truly amazing that it means I cannot remarry. Totally getting that revised to say "Divorce from the bond of matrimony."
Gosh darn. The day we got married... I never ever thought I'd be here now.
So was his wording in the D paperwork just a typo or is he seriously wanting you to never remarry? Is he holding himself to that standard as well? What a jerk. Consider yourself lucky to be rid of him. Please make sure your L is on YOUR SIDE!! Make sure you understand everything in the paperwork so you're not surprised later.
I'm sure most of us in this forum "never ever thought we'd be here."
I did read an interesting article in a magazine the other day. A woman had just gotten dumped by her fiance and she was sobbing to her family about it when her little niece said to her "I'm glad he's gone, he was scary." She said "No, he wasn't scary." and the little niece replied "if he wasn't so scary, then why did you act like less of yourself when you were with him."
I took that to heart. I think I was less of myself with my H and I know that I'm less of myself when I beg him not to leave me when he was the one who screwed up our lives.
When you are happy as person without someone, you are in a better position to determine whether a partner will enhance your happy life or weighs it down.
When you are happy as an individual, you are in a better position to determine whether a partner enhances your happy life or weighs it down.
So was his wording in the D paperwork just a typo or is he seriously wanting you to never remarry?
Not a typo. That's the way it was set up (though I believe it means we don't have a full D... kind of like a half-D in the sense there would be no remarriages until this one is "final.") Weird, right? It's not a "divorce from the bond of matrimony."
Sooo... I called a L a few days ago and he just got back to me and said he'd give me a free consultation today! He mentioned a fee that sounded ok but I'll know more after The Talk.
Sooo... I called a L a few days ago and he just got back to me and said he'd give me a free consultation today! He mentioned a fee that sounded ok but I'll know more after The Talk.
D really really sucks.
Good job Sol! you should be able to do that with a few more...sometimes right over the phone which is convenient.
Yes it does suck- but if you have to be here this is the best bunch of people to be around which helps a lot.
(((hugs)))
Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
Yes it does suck- but if you have to be here this is the best bunch of people to be around which helps a lot.
(((hugs)))
Amen to that! Eventhough I've never met any of you or seen your faces, you guys really are an AWESOME support system(virtual or otherwise). Woo hoo to DB posters!
CTH, that happened to me. A week after I moved I got a PSA saying there was "no chance for reconciliation." I sometimes thinks he couldn't wait to get rid of me, that maybe that's why he acted that way the entire time leading up to that.
We'll see about the legal fees...
I saw the new L and will be retaining him. He is a little more expensive but advised me to sign over the PSA (stbx getting house) and he will ask for me to get some sort of settlement. None of the L's I'd been to said that to me before. He said stbx's income is significantly higher and I shouldn't just walk away with nothing.
