She'll laugh. She's grown into and gotten accostomed to her current way of dealing with you, and an affair ontop of it does not help anything in your favour.
Yeah, I don't see a lot of respect from her, either in her words or actions. Then again, considering how much I've waffled in the last 60 days (not to mention the last 11 years), if I were her, I'd expect the same.
that the only good attention and kindness she gets is from the man she's trying to leave...
Yeah, yeah, sometimes her melodrama even rubs off on me.
I meant to say that she's pretty much alone in this; her family isn't very supportive, and she doesn't have a lot of really close friends that she's confiding in.
I've been her friend for 13 years, and she's realizing what she's losing.
She snapped "I'll probably be asleep when you get home,"
She didn't ask a question so it doesn't require a response. She's testing him by being snappy. The test requires a response. "Sounds to me like you could use some sleep." Said with a cheerful voice, spin around with your gym bag and head out the door. You acknowledge her, let her know her CB doesn't bother you and you are a busy man. That show's confidence and a little humor. You don't let her behavior bring you down or affect you. But you don't reward it.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Yeah, I don't see a lot of respect from her, either in her words or actions. Then again, considering how much I've waffled in the last 60 days (not to mention the last 11 years), if I were her, I'd expect the same.
pinhead,
What if she is not "giving less" respect? What if she is treating you the way she feels you should be treated? What if going up from here, would be viewed as an act by her? What if it is ALL SUBCONSCIOUS? That to get her to revert to her "normal" behavior will almost be a complete miracle?
I can't read her mind. She's said that when confronted with a problem, I tend to withdraw. That I'm passive too much.
She was fine with me when she got a lot of attention, and that changed as I gave attention to my career, hobbies and even my kids. I'm the one who makes most of the decisions in the family, always have been; but she likes the idea of "planting seeds" in my head to get me to agree to what she wants.
She is treating me the way she feels she should. She's leaving because she wants someone else, who she's attracted to. Perhaps this dream man has some of my good traits, along with more confidence and assertiveness. Don't know, that's mind reading.
I'm becoming more assertive, not afraid of her emotions. Not letting fear of the unknown scare me. Not avoiding confrontation as much as I used to. Expressing my needs more clearly, defining boundaries much better.
If she likes that, great. Maybe we can find some common ground where a R will work. She'll need to make changes to accomodate my needs and boundaries. Otherwise, I'll find someone whom I'm attracted to that will.
Maybe there's a lesson in there too. It's easy to start over again, it's easy to find someone new but having discipline and a strong resolve to fix what is broken is important, and choosing the easier paths in life doesn't build character and doesn't say alot about you. The flipside is maybe life doesn't have to be hard and I make things difficult on myself because i just don't know when to quit.
Maybe there's a lesson in there too. It's easy to start over again, it's easy to find someone new but having discipline and a strong resolve to fix what is broken is important, and choosing the easier paths in life doesn't build character and doesn't say alot about you. The flipside is maybe life doesn't have to be hard and I make things difficult on myself because i just don't know when to quit.
