Not sure where to start, or end. WAW?

[Steve McQueen]

since i can related to the "spoon" incident all too much, i would like to comment on a couple of other things that stand out in your postings:

there are a couple things you wrote, about the hair band and her reaction to you going out and something about your wife wanting to know if there is another woman in the house, that reads like your wife is suspsicous of you having an affair. your lack of "attention to the matter" when she stripped for you doesn't help that. what else have you been doing intentionally or maybe subconsciously that may possibly give her that suspsicion, and reason to freak out on probably her own rubber band and spoon?

your wife said to your previous MC, is it like she has 2 kids to take care of. was she ever more specific about that with you?

you also wrote about your wife saying she feels "smothered" a couple times. your new MC, started right off talking about "wanting to want" and creating a new marriage, to you, does that seem like more "smothering?" did she have any "tips" on how to become better communicators with each other, so incidents like "the spoon" and the same fight every 6 months and the need for you all to "talk" to other people doesn't continue?

[john28]

there are a couple things you wrote, about the hair band and her reaction to you going out and something about your wife wanting to know if there is another woman in the house, that reads like your wife is suspsicous of you having an affair. your lack of "attention to the matter" when she stripped for you doesn't help that. what else have you been doing intentionally or maybe subconsciously that may possibly give her that suspsicion, and reason to freak out on probably her own rubber band and spoon?

I just think at the time I was being mysterious and she was very suspicious. I was not telling her everything and I've never done that before, ever. That was highly uncharacteristic of me, and it probably made her worry. As far as the nudity incident, she has told me on no uncertain terms that we'll have sex anytime in the near future, and I was just respecting that boundary.

your wife said to your previous MC, is it like she has 2 kids to take care of. was she ever more specific about that with you?

Yes. I was needy, crying, begging, doing all the wrong things which in turn made me look like a big baby. That's what she was saying.

you also wrote about your wife saying she feels "smothered" a couple times. your new MC, started right off talking about "wanting to want" and creating a new marriage, to you, does that seem like more "smothering?" did she have any "tips" on how to become better communicators with each other, so incidents like "the spoon" and the same fight every 6 months and the need for you all to "talk" to other people doesn't continue?

Somewhat. The MC talked about transparency being key in our relationship right now. She talked about how we need to set rules and guidelines for our marriage. She talked about the first step being that W had to make the commitment to "wanting to want" and then we could begin the process of recovery. I think this meeting was the basis of a "gateway" to other tools we could use. There's only so much you can talk about in 1 hour.

[john28]

Man - the anticipation of this email is eating me alive. I've got serious anxiety issues right now, on the verge of an attack. The reason being that my wife hasn't put her feelings into words very well in the past, and now she's making the effort to write them all out and is planning on letting me see it. This is so nerve racking. Ugh!!!!!!!!!!

[pinhead]

Keep your expectations low.

[john28]

Keep your expectations low.

Easy to say, hard to do

[pinhead]

It's easy. Just remember how you felt on Father's Day. You had high expectations that it'd be a good day, right?

[john28]

Well, I guess that if she writes the worst email of all time to the MC from my perspective, we'll at least stay in limbo or something for a little while longer while I 180 and DB. We are afterall going to have the boundary discussion today. I'm actually looking forward to that part of the day.

But, I'm fully prepared to have my heart broken when I read what she has written. I'm almost certain that it will be crushed, despite my efforts to disconnect and stay strong and positive.

[pinhead]

Your heart will NOT be crushed. You will be disappointed. It will be one small setback. Don't give her the power to break your heart..

[PMA_Baby!]

Don't give her the power to break your heart..

Wise words. Why do you give her this much POWER and CONTROL? What happened to "Hold on to your nuts" mentality?

Man up!! or you will lose her for sure. She want's a LEADER and a WARRIOR. Not somebody that lives in FEAR.

"Hold the Line!!" PMA

[Steve McQueen]

Yes. I was needy, crying, begging, doing all the wrong things which in turn made me look like a big baby. That's what she was saying.