LBS Script & Flying on Instruments

[Coach]

Stop talking to your wife, you seem to go backwards every time you do.

Who likes to be talked to?

You lead on the issues.
"Here is what I have decided about the house."
"You can stay on my health insurance until _________ after that you will need to find your own plan."

You listen to her, if she starts going off about not being able to afford _____. Just say, "that's what happens when you get divorced." It's not your problem.

You have to let them go so they can face the brutal reality - family split, miss you, money is tight, face their issues in the M. Let them feel all of it, it's theirs to own. You want your WAS to come back because they decided they want to be with you.

somehow I always end-up defending myself instead because I am being attacked.

A woman wants her man to be able to weather her feelings. She needs to feel safe. You are not being attacked - how did you get hurt? If she beat you or verbally abused you then OK, you were attacked. Her feelings are her feelings, that's OK.

I wish there was some easy way for me to know what to do, because I just can't seem to figure it out.

When she tells you how she feels just listen. It's not personal. Agree with her feelings, "I can see how you would feel that way. How can I help you with that?" Then listen with all your senses, be in tune with her.