When the bomb first dropped through my hurt and anger my mantra was, "This wasn't done to me, it was done for me". If H could do something like this I was better off without him.
I've revisited that saying recently, not with hurt or anger. It makes more sense to me now than then. It's all in perception.
Because this happened I've been allowed the opportunity if I chose to take a good look in the mirror. I did choose to look and that continues...
My blessing in this is that I would not have done the reflecting or the work if this had not have happened. My M was good most of the time as far as I was concerned. I was not the only one concerned though, and I can see more clearly now why some of the things my H said stung. Those are the things I have worked on and still do, they are part of my journey for me. Admittedly, I started out working on them to try and bring H back. What I have found is that they are for my benefit. So yeah, this really wasn't done to me, but for me.
