You can't have everything, where would you put it?

[ClingingToHope]

Couple of things tonight. On the way to the water park -- it was my night with the girls and we had free tickets -- D11 told me she talked to STBXW's older sister.

SIL asked how they were doing with the divorce and D11 said they were OK. She told SIL it was hardest on me -- that I still love STBXW.

That gave me pause. I want them to know I love their mom and this wasn't my choice, but I don't want them to feel sorry for me.

How do you do that?

Wednesdays at the water park they stay open until 9 p.m. It was close to the closing when I thought of how much I enjoy spending time with the girls. It's just a lot of fun. And then I tried to remember fun times with STBXW and there were remarkably few.

I mean, we never went to the water park on Wet Wednesdays. She rarely wanted to do anything. She just likes to sit and watch TV and read books.

When we were younger it was like pulling teeth to get her to do anything. For a long time she would do it. I remember on our anniversary, I got her to go snorkeling. We talked about it for years.

But then she started saying no and meaning it and then I stopped asking and just assuming she'd say no.

Honestly, we aren't well matched when it comes to doing things. She's just ... boring.

Whoever comes along next, they have to want to get out there. I'm tired of doing things on my own. That's why I love having the girls so much.